New Beginings and Growth

It's only the second last day of November and I'm already reflecting over the year.

What a doozy it's been.

There have been some life changing events.

And while I argue with the stars and the Universe that I'm not ready for these changes, I don't have a choice.

Things happen.

They will continue to happen.

And all I can do is hang on and hope.

But while I sit around feeling sorry for myself, completely absorbed in my own pity party, I know I'm supposed to be acting like an adult.

So I try to pull up my frilly knickers and get on with it.

That's what you do.

Life carries on so you just get on with it.

The kids still need raising.

The house still needs cleaning.

The garden needs watering.

I'm grateful for all that I have and try to look at the positive side of things.

All the changes are to teach me lessons.

My biggest lesson has been to make every moment count.

It's just plain cruddy that it takes such big changes to make me realize that.

Maybe I forget to always appreciate things and that's why the Universe keeps sending me these reminders.

But I'm listening now.

I'm tired and don't want any more big changes for a while.

None beyond my control/choosing, anyway.

One door closes and another one opens.

That's what they say.

I'm motivated to open my own door.

I just wish there was some way to know what the right or best decisions are.

Do I give the heart what it wants?

Or do I use my noggin and question everything so much that I twist it up and take so long to figure it out I lose the opportunity (I guess that would be the Universe stepping in)?

Usually the heart wins.

Stupid, romanticized, emotional thing it is.

But I'm actually putting a lot of thought in this time.

I'm guarded.

Walls are up.

How much more can the soul take.

I'll figure it out.

Or I won't.

Time to close my eyes, spread my wings and fly..

I just hope I open the door before I try to fly through it!