Kitty-Puss, My Heart

My beautiful, sweet Scribble has made her journey to the clouds.

The awful c word has spread to her lungs and progressed faster than expected.

The regular coughing fits became harder for her to recover from and to save her from suffering, we had to make the gut-wrenching decision.

Our Vet is an amazing, compassionate person and let us take Scribble home for one last night together.

On Wednesday morning I sat on the couch crocheting a cardigan, Scribble curled on my lap and we watched one of my favourite movies together (Twister).

We were so alike, Scribble and I, both quite easily scared. We sat patiently waiting for the TV to load Netflix, and when the intro sound thumped out we both got a fright and jumped.

When spent the whole morning cuddled together until she began to cough severely and I knew I couldn't let her struggle to breathe anymore.

Her journey to the clouds was so, so peaceful.

For that I am grateful.

No more suffering, my beautiful pussy-cat. 

It rips my heart anew when I expect to see her somewhere and then realise she isn't, and won't ever be again.

She loved soaking up the afternoon sun from our bedroom window sill.

And her favourite place to sleep during the day is right up in my banana shaped pillows.

Her favourite blanket was the teal throw I made with super-quick yarn so I bought another ball to make her a piece of the blanket to take with her.

On our last afternoon we caught the last of the afternoon sunrays together.

I buried her near the new clothesline I built a couple of weeks ago, and made a garden bed on top of her resting place. In the garden I have planted dahlias, snapdragons and a beautiful orange climbing rose.

Scribbles garden.

I cant decide how I feel.

I am definitely heart broken but I think I am angry.

So angry.

These sweet little creatures love us and it's our duty to provide them the best life they could dream for, but in the end, we can't put off the inevitable.

Scribble I am so sorry. You truly were the perfect companion and I hope you liked your life with me.

🤍🤍🤍

I'm Still Here

It has been a long time since I've felt like writing.

Saying goodbye to Venus really knocked me for a loop and I tucked myself away, thinking nothing was worth saying. 

But I have been quietly busy, teaching myself new skills.

I have given embroidery a go and despite my lack of patience and preferring fast results, I love sitting quietly, threading the fabric with colour.

I caught covid and when I wasn't in bed sleeping it off, I was tucked up on the couch watching documentaries and series, working away on the countless projects on the go.

My friend is having a baby in October so I made her a Call The Midwife inspired blanket.

And booties from my Nanna's vintage pattern. I'd like to make the whole set but people don't seem to dress their babies in bonnets and mittens any more.

Another friend had twins! So for her I made matching blankets.

Her tiny baby girls can both fit under one blanket at the moment. Too cute!

I've made a couple of dresses for myself. 

I used jersey stretch to make this 2 panel dress. 

By panel I mean back and front! 

No other seams that the shoulders and sides.

Perfectly simple!

I've become obsessed with ribbons and lace and made myself two of these flanelette nightdresses. The other has long sleeves. I didn't use a pattern, just winged it, as I do, and am so please with how it turned out. My boys call them ghost nighties.

The garden has been a very slow point which saddens me because i get so much joy from having a garden.

This giant bed was here when we bought this house last year but I want raised beds as I'm not getting any younger, and high walls will make it a bit harder for chooks and ducks to munch my vegies!

So sand was trucked in and leveled out.

And slowly the grass runners I plant are spreading to give a nice lawned area to enjoy in summer. Toward the fence I will have my raised beds which I excited will order in a couple of weeks. Then I can get back into the joy of growing my food.

Now some unhappy news.

My heartbreak of losing a furry love will be happening again very soon.

Kitty-puss had a large lump on her chest that was removed and sent for testing which came back with the worst results.

Cancer.

An xray was done and has shown that it has spread to her lungs.

The original expectancy of 12 months has been reduced to 6-8 weeks.

So my beautiful, 13 year old Scribble is getting her favourite cooked chicken as often as she likes, and having all the snuggle naps with me we can manage in between work and chores.

It's just not fair.

Im not sure if I have he strength to go through another loss, especially so soon after Venus, but I have no choice.

I must keep in mind that I have tried to give them the best possible lives they could have, and maybe I'll see them again one day.

Beyond the iridescent rainbow clouds.

🤍🤍🤍

Anxiety Is Not My Friend.

Anxiety and depression suck!

Everything can be (and basically is) going so well but the feeling of foreboding just lingers like a bad smell.

Im having panic attacks just driving through town, anticipation of the expected blast of extra people that will inevitably be filling the town over the holidays.

The days are draaaaaagggging!

All energy is a beautiful, distant memory of days gone by when I could wake up one morning and decide to paint an entire room and have it done by evening.

All activities, big or small, take careful planning.

I want to stake the tomatoes? Better make sure I'm not working the next day in case my back seizes and I exhaust myself.

It's pathetic and destroying and frustrating and heartbreaking.

I am trying so hard to just be.

All the things I love to do, the things that make me who I am, just exhaust me at the thought.

Crocheting seems like running a marathon and aches my head.

I want to crochet but when I think about picking up some wool and a hook it seems too hard.

I am thankful to have finished the twin's blankets before their arrival.

I have the Dahlia yarn pack from Attic24 still tucked away.

The colours are screaming at me, my heart needs their warmth and vibrancy, but can I really be bothered?

The sun comes out to warm my bones but it's easier to lay in bed than sit on a chair out the back.

I force myself to make short trips to the beach for Son3, before the crowds arrive.

It's taken me this long to write a blog post and here I am, whinging.

As Son2 would say.. you want some cheese with that whine?

I hope I can look back at this post in the very near future and think, thank goodness I got through that.

Holidays are coming up.

I will be able to rest up, absorb the sunshine and moon glow, take my time and hopefully feel better.

Big apologies for a very negative post but better out than in, right?

🤍

A New Chapter

We woke on a Tuesday morning before the sun had risen, with a circus of anticipation pelting through our bodies.

It was the day we has waited a month for.

Excuse after reason after many sleepless nights of scary uncertainty, wondering if our family including our furry and feathered loves would be forced to separate if this day didn't come soon.

Office opening hours came and went with no word.

We paced.

Checked our phones for any missed calls or messages.

Then news.. we will meet at 1 o'clock.

My stars, we couldn't wait!

But then more reasons and excuses.

So much heartache for something that should have been  one of our happiest days.

But the inevitable happened.

Just much later in the day and month than we were told to expect. 

At 5.20pm on the 28th of September we were given the keys to our new family home!

I am so, so smitten with our new nest.

I unpacked quite quickly, filling the spaces with our beloved possessions wondering how on Earth I managed to fit it all in my previous little house. 

We have been so blessed to have the wonderful friends that we do, that generously offered space for storage.

I had potted plants I couldn't bear to part with taking up too much space in one friends backyard, along with towers of boxes in her shed. Our furniture was in another friends storage shed and all of our yard tools, shed contents and garden and outdoor items were at another location.

The chookies and ducks were at one house, Pooch Girl, Kitty Puss and us humans at another.

Even my indoor plants were having a long sleepover at another friends house!

Initially we expected to only need the storage space and roof over our heads for a week at the very most.

But one week turned into two.

And another.

It was hard not to feel like we were abusing our friendships by wearing out our welcome but our friends really shone for us and we will never forget their unconditional tolerance and support, and will always be there to return the kindness.

So here we are, settling in.

This is home now. 

It doesn't quite have that homely feel yet but I will bring it in time.

14 years in my last house, who's to say it won't take that long to turn this into our comfortable little haven?

But I know it won't.

There are countless moths that fly around the house at night.

This moth-girl loves it!

We have a fruiting mulberry tree and passionfruit vines.

The fruit trees that moved with us are thriving in their pots for now.

Some vegie seedlings are in.

Hedges ripped out and roses and natives take their place.

The chookies and ducks have a nice pen to share and are giving us lots of happy eggs.

Kitty Puss settled in incredibly fast.

And Pooch Girl.

Oh, my beautiful sweet girl.

Her 13 years seem to have caught up to her overnight and we have been advised that she is just on quality of life now.

Her arthritis has become so severe she drags her feet, her lady legs get crossed up while she walks, hearing is almost completely gone.. 

She still smiles and thumps her tail when she sees us.

She cannot sit up so we lie with her and let her nuzzle her nose into the folds of our elbows, giving herself the good scratch she can't use her legs for.

I have been off work this week with back problems so Pooch Girl and I rest together watching movies and working on rainbow baby blankets for twins.

I managed to finish Son3's rainbow blanket before the move, photos to come.

 

I also created two 9x5 entries for an annual auction one of our local art centres hold.

So great to have a designated space to make a colourful mess in now. 

And nobody had a problem with me claiming the office as my art room - hooray!

Alas, the bookcase is proving problematic. 

Too many books, not enough shelves, not high enough on the list of priorities.

The rain is falling heavy on the tin roof making me drowsy.

Kitty Puss is balled up beside me, already chasing moths around the land of dreams.

Time for me to join the rest of my snoring family...

🤍🤍🤍

Bush Heart

Hello Spring.

It is so good to know you have come to visit us.

Though I hope it isn't too long before you shoo the chilly days away for a while.

We have said our goodbyes to our little home but are not able to move into our new house and begin making it home yet.

So to fill some time while we wait for that day, we took a short bush walk by the lake.

So many different native orchids.

These are Caledonia's, and the first pic is just Onion Weed but too pretty to not to share.

Its amazing how spectacular nature can be.

This is a teeny tiny Purple Cockatoo orchid.

The Caledonia's are much the same size.

So delicate.

I think these littlies are common Fringed Lillies.

The wildflowers range from small as your thumbnail to the towering Grass Trees!

And such diverse shapes, like this beautiful Banksia flower!

The leaves are a bit spiky but the flowers are lovely soft.

There are oodles of Myrtle bushes all along the trail.

And the Golden Wattle, or Acacias, are one of my favourites. 

They have a sweet scent that floats along the breeze.

I was so excited a few years ago when I spotted these Spider Orchids for the first time.

I had no idea how close to town they are and just how many!

I did this walk maybe two weeks ago and the trail was abundant with them, but this time they had disappeared. 

Hopefully not picked by passers-by as they should be left for everyone to enjoy, and its illegal to pick wildflowers. 

The colours of these orchids, about the size of your palm, varies so intensely!

Its a beautiful walk to take.

Away from traffic and people.

Just listening to ducks, frogs, finches, willy wagtails...

You might bump into the odd kangaroo having a munch too!

Which reminds me, I have someone special to introduce you to...

This is Sunny!

Boof was at work a couple of weeks ago and passed a kangaroo on the side of the road that had been hit by a car and killed.

As he drove by he noticed some long legs poking out of its pouch, and they were moving!

He found a place to park his truck, unhooked his trailers and turned around to make the rescue. 

I met with him in town and took her home to keep her warm (the vet had no available wildlife carers for the weekend so we got to have her).

We learnt she is 7 months old and wasn't injured so she has a wonderful chance of recovering without her mama.

Sunny is the sweetest little love.

At midnight she was wide awake being a bit silly so I popped her on the floor to explore.

She began to hiss, looking for her mum so I sat with her.

She came to me, shnuggled my neck and used her paws to open the neck of my shirt and before I knew it, she had somersaulted into my tshirt where she remained for the night.

The next day we took her to a licensed carer and she has said we can babysit our Sunny on weekends when we settle into the new house.

We feel in love with Sunny and can't wait to see her again.

Well that is my Spring tale for you.

I hope you are as excited as I am about the amazing orchids.

What a find!

🤍🤍🤍

Dappled Winter Light

Winter at my little piece of Earth is mild in comparison to others.

It doesn't snow, the sun still shines down.

But that's not to say it doesn't get chilly cold. The wind howls. Everything is wet regardless of rain. And the days are short.

Perfect weather for having a crackling fire going. Pumpkin soup simmering away. 

Countless games of Cluedo and Kalaha with my boys.

Curling up under a crocheted blanket with a warm chai latte, reading a book (currently making my way through 'A Promised Land' by Barack Obama).

And working on new drawings.

My house is teeny, I dont have a 'studio' or designated work space, so I sprawl over my bed.

Copics, watercolour pencils, graphite pencils, brushes, tape, all my bits and bobs strewn all over and showered in eraser rubbings. 

The sunlight dapples as it shines in through the peppermint tree, hibiscus, Cape Bell tree, and other gardeny loves outside my window.

I drew this girl years ago and finally have made her into a full piece.

Warm tones.

Sparkly clouds of course.

'Carlotta' is now part of my wild rose family.

I am appreciating all the little things so much lately.

The dappled light.

The sound of the breeze through my garden.

The clouds directly over my house.

If I look through a small section of my front garden amongst tuart leaves and a grevillea, I can see the sun cast out strong bright rays as it makes its descent beyond the horizon.

From my backyard and giant kitchen window I can watch the clouds details reflect the colours of sunset.

I am a nature lover, not just flora and fauna, but the wonder of the sky as well.

These are small blessings I am grateful for.

🤍🤍🤍