Lemonee, Lemonah

Today I have been reflecting on what a year it has been.

I have said goodbye to my beautiful girls and still have moments where my heart catches in my throat when I remember something they did, or if I think they have entered the room (maybe they have - I hope that they do).

My emotional health became very unwell due to my job. I lost my inner joy and peace. I forgot who I was.

A change was necessary.

So I pulled up my big-girl trousers and took myself into a company to apply for a position. 

Things must have gone well because I have now been working there for three weeks!

I am a totally different person to the one I was 2 months ago.

I am painting again, noticing the stars, enjoying the clouds, baking, reading, and SMILING!!!

I was actually startled during my first day at the new job because I laughed... it had been so long!!

*happy, content sigh*

Before I began my new chapter, Boof and I took a trip to the river. The picture above was the sunrise I got up to watch. Kookaburras were cackling right outside our window.

I stopped in at my faaaavourite Cafe.

Everything on the menu is vegan, and while I am a pescatarian that simply prefers the taste of soy milk to cows, I love love love the options here! 

And the decor is relaxed retro/vintage/boho. 

It is such a comfortable place to tuck up on the couch and enjoy a soy chai latte and a jackfruit Reuben!

Boofs mum and dad have a beautiful garden and let me take home a huuuuge box of lemons! The same day we got home I busied myself making oodles of lemon cordial.

Thin slices, dehydrated in the oven to add to a cup of black tea.

Or a jug of iced tea.

Of course there was lemon pie...

And gooey lemon bars!

Now i am a bit lemon'd out so have spent the last 2 weekends making mulberry jam from our tree. No pics though, I forgot. Today I picked 2.5kgs of fruit!

Last year the fruit was very small and dry. This year with a bit of love they are enormous, super juice and lovely sweet.

The flowers have been  going bananas! I have been picking roses to bring inside (a dream I've held tight for years!). The foxgloves and hollyhocks are booming!

I spotted Mr Moth while exploring the depths of my bit of nature.

When all the chores are done -or even if they aren't and I just ignore them - I pick up the Dahlia blanket again. This one will only be a throw so not too big. Ooh those colours!

Springtime is finally arriving and we have had some beautiful days, though my shoulders feel a bit sunburnt.. must've been while I was picking mulberries. 

Til next time...

🤍🤍🤍

Weekend Delights... on a Wednesday!

Its the end of Wednesday.

The evening ritual is underway.

A cup of warm, sweet tea has filled my belly.

I've enjoyed a soothing hot shower using beautiful handmade soap.

The room has been spritzed with 'sleep' mist, and the matching oil has been splashed into my bedside dish (handmade by Son2) of lavender.

My fluffy pillows and doona swallow me in, safe in my nest.

The only light is from my dim bedside lamp (and phone as I type).

The wind is whooshing through the peppermint tree in the front yard.

PoochGirl has kerplunked herself (n)ever-gracefully on the carpet on my side of the bed.

I would usually read a chapter or two before switching off the lamp and letting the oils and wind drift me away to Slumberland, but tonight I want to share some Weekend Delights with you.

A few weekends ago ~ my favourite time of week ~ I decided it was time to pull up my 'stonker' (that's Aussie for big, hehe) beetroot and make something deelish.

Definitely a record for beetroot grown in my patch!

It would have been the perfect size to pickle and slice for sandwiches and burgers, but I had a more exotic plan for this baby, and its friends that remained protecting it.

I had found a simple but tasty looking recipe for beetroot and feta salad, so it was decided quite instantly that that would be my Saturday lunch.

Beetroots were cleaned, boiled til tender, then mixed with oodles of feta.

A zesty lemon and parsley vinaigrette drizzled on top.

Nom nom!

But wait!

Such a simple yet fancy treat can't be had on its own.

I took some juicy sweet lemons that I'd been allowed to help myself to at Boof's parents and squeezed and squeezed....

To make the bestest home made lemonade to go with my salad.

I took my tasty lunch into the garden and enjoyed the sunshine as I ate and drank, admiring my spring-awakened garden.

I am a simple girl.

(The rest of the beetroot haul went into a tart)

The poppies are coming to an end.

Son3 and I have begun collecting the seeds to spread for next year and to share with friends.

It has been a rewarding feeling to host so many bees with my poppies.

Til next year, my buzzy buddies..

Also a few weekends ago, I completed a special crochet gift for a friend.

She and I work together.

She has a little scooty stool (for lack of adult terminology) that she uses but its vinyl seat had been cut a few years ago and taped back together.

It wasn't holding together very well anymore so I suggested making a cover for it.

I followed a pattern for half of it but then had to wing it to make it large enough.

She is such a bright and bubbly character, it had to suit her sparkly personality. 

She was thrilled to bits when she saw it.

Nyaw, I get warm fuzzies in my tummy just thinking back about it :)

My sleepy oils are setting in.

Eyes are getting drowsy.

Breathing is getting deeper. Longer.

I just realised something a bit silly of me..

I have already titled this post so will leave it as a bit of a funny..

But I only just remembered it is not actually Wednesday today..

It's Thursday!!

Haha, ah well!

It was a good Thursday and it makes us even closer to the weekend!

I hope yours is full of all things that make your chops shmile and your heart sing.

But for now, I'm of to Slumberland 🤍🤍🤍

Me Time

This is the beautiful sky that the plane carrying my boys flew into this week. 

I waited by the fence as I do every time they leave.

The breeze was icy and chilled my bones.

Luckily the rain and gusty wind had passed about half an hour before.

I waved at the plane as it left, trying my hardest to catch a glimpse of the boys waving back but I can never see for the dark tinted glass.

Only once they were in the air after a safe takeoff I walked away.

I reached my car.

Got in.

And cried, hard.

Took some breaths and got myself together, started the car and drove home.

My goodness, those boys drive me bonkers but it breaks me to not have them with me.

It is only a week and they will be back and my heart can be at peace, so I try to make the most of the quiet.

I watch the moonset in the morning over tea.

Acai bowls for breakfast with the tastiest bananas I've ever had in my life!

I had my hair cut.

Its actually a big deal.

To me anyhoo..

It was down to the small of my back, falling out all over the place, going ratty at the ends and just being a plain nuisance. 

I am loving this shorter length.

And french tip shellac.

Im feeling much fresher.

Ive been soaking up the sunshine.. when it comes out.

Not today though.

Its chilly chilly out today and raining so I am curled up inside keeping warm and working hard to finish a crochet project.

Being winter and less food being available to the wild birds, we've been putting seed treats out for them. 

We have 2 pairs of 28's (parrots) visit us daily.

The sun starts to set and I know I'm another day closer to my babies being home.

I had many plans for this first week of holidays.

I wanted to push myself back into my art, go for walks, make creative meals, maybe take some naps...

I havent done any of that, have been super busy but Im not actually sure what doing.

Ah well.

The holidays arent over yet.

I am grateful for..

1. Holidays. I am so blessed to have this time off and just being able to slow down a bit and switch off to things.

2. Rain. Naturally keeping my garden green, filling the duck pond and helping the farmers to grow our food.

3. The movie, Forrest Gump. Currently playing the dvd and absorbing the inspiring story. This one never gets old or loses its message.

Anxiety Heart

After receiving word regarding work and the decision to return ultimately up to myself, I decided I will go back next week. 

I am so, so grateful to have my job, the flexibility, the hours to suit being a mum as well, and the opportunity to show my boys that to get what you want, you need to work for it.. but I am petrified of going back.

Anxiety hit me like a train, knocking the air out of my lungs and turning me into a useless, shaking mess.

My thoughts were dizzying. 

Its not that I dont want to go back to work, its not that I'm scared of the virus risk, there have been no cases in our town - reported...

Its that home is where my heart and soul feel most at peace.

I am my happiest when I'm caring for my family.

I dont like crowds, I have panic attacks just going to the supermarket.

At work I know these people, I know I'm safe, I accept all this.

So why am I so terrified of people?!

To ease the jitters I keep busy.

Simple chores to keep my hands busy and mind thinking of basic tasks rather than over thinking and questioning everything.

So washing is hung in the afternoon sun.

The smell of fresh laundry, grass, and sweet sea breeze wafting over my skin and through my hair.

My heartrate slows.

I breathe a little easier.

I go inside and bake.

Lemon Slice, Boof's favourite. 

Crush 400g of plain biscuits, I use my food processor.

Add 2 cups of shredded coconut and the finely grated rind of 1 lemon.

In a small saucepan gently heat a tin of condensed milk (just the contents, not the tin 🙃) and 200g of butter until the butter is melted. Stir often to avoid burning.

Pour into your bowl of dry ingredients and mix it all together.

Pour the mix into a tray lined with baking paper - leave enough baking paper overhanging the ends to use as handles when its time to lift it out of the tray.

Flatten it all out evenly, I use my masher but hands are just fine.

Pop in the fridge for an hour and a half to firm up.

To make the icing mix 2 cups of icing sugar, 20g of soft butter and the juice of your lemon (used for rind earlier).

If it is too funny add more icing sugar.

When the base is done in the fridge spread the icing over and let it stand for 30 mins to set.

It no longer needs refrigeration.

*I double the base recipe (not the icing) as I have hungry boys and like to use a full tin of condensed milk in one go. If you want a smaller slice please halve these measurements.

Lift out of the tray using your baking paper handles.

Cut yourself a yummy slice to go with a cup of tea, and find some sunshine to soak up.

Crocheting has helped me most, since I began having anxiety problems at 11 years old.

Nature is my other big healer.

I find the wind rushing through the trees very soothing.

I love the rain.

I adore thunder.

Sitting in the last of the afternoon sun calms me, reminding me that tomorrow the sun will rise again and so will I.

I got through today, I can get through tomorrow. 

I just need to remind myself that.

No specific gratitudes today.

I like to think this post is one big gratitude tribute.

🖤🖤🖤

Homebound & Loving It

Here we are, week 5 (I think.. I've lost count) of being homebound. 

I am still loving it and the boys don't seem to be minding it either.

It is super nice to stay in our jammies that little bit longer - especially with the mornings getting chilly!

Theres no schedule to stick to, making our usual day to day routines and chores less stressful.

We get our jobs done (housework, making beds, tending pets) without the pressure of time running out and having so much to do like on a regular work/school day.

Movies are being watched, jigsaw puzzles completed, books read, games played.. 

It's so nice 💛

**I just wanted to edit this in.. I am in no way enjoying the reason we are at home and under such restrictions. I have cried watching the news, I am not heartless. I am just trying to focus on my little family and making the most of our time together.

I have discovered my new favourite comfort food ~ wonton soup!

I found the recipe my good friend had used to make it but i was unable to find the wonton pastry locally, and my mojo being a bit low that day, rather than making my own i just bought some pre-made seafood dumplings.

I ate so much I must be starting to look like a dumpling ;)

Boof has always refused to eat soup while he still has his teeth (he's hilarious!) But he tried this one and really enjoyed it. 

I made a comment about his teeth and soup, but he informed me that this wasnt soup and was actually broth with stuff in it.

He makes me laugh!

The garden is slowly coming back to life.

I planted out my broad bean seedlings a few days ago, and some radishes.

The celery, potatoes, spinach and garlic are doing really well.

Barbara is still jumping the vege fence and trying to scratch up the carrots - naughty!

There have been so many of these beautiful butterflies in the garden lately.

I watched this one chasing away cabbage moths for half an hour.

He/she is more than welcome to stay!

Apparently butterflies are a sign of change, I wonder what could be on the horizon..

Nothing wrong with believing in a bit of magic/folklore over coincidence ;)

I fiiiiinalllllyyyy finished my teal blanket!!

Its ribbed stitch gives it a really nice texture and is super chunky.

It is the perfect size for shnuggling under on the couch with a warm malt milo (my current fave comfort drink), and a book. 

I got halfway through Sleeping Beauties by Stephen and Owen King but decided it wasn't my type of book.

I moved on to The Lucky Galah by Tracy Sorenson. I love that is was based in Australia so was very relatable, and set in the 60's made me love it more. It took 2 nights to finish :)

I have just started A Ragged Schooling by Robert Roberts.

We were low on cleaning fizzies so I whipped up another batch.

Its quite satisfying to make your own cleaning products and know that they are eco friendly.

We drop one of these in the toilet, they fizz up for a couple of minutes, then we give it a scrub, flush and shazam! Sparkling clean!

To make your own you need to mix 300g of bi-carb soda with 130g of citric acid. Add 30g of a carrier oil, i use fractionated coconut oil, and mix it together. It should hold together when you squeeze it in your hand, if not, add a little more oil. I add a few drops of essential oil to the mix, lime and orange are my faves. Squish it into some moulds. I have an ice cube tray with a silicone base for easy extraction, and I also used a silicone chocolate mould. Leave them to set overnight, then pop them out of the moulds and store in an airtight container. Easy!

**This is not my own recipe!

It was passed on to me and I unfortunately cannot give credit to the original creator.**

A few weeks ago I sadly had 4 more trees removed from my little property.

They were growing right along a fence and had gotten so big that they were starting to push and buckle it.

It had to be done.

I love, love, love trees and it hurt my heart to have them removed.

Im trying to be positive though, they were super messy.. I mean crazy leaf mess everywhere!

In the house, the shed, in the window screens!

So yard work should be a little lighter now and the best thing, it has opened up our yard so much. 

I dont mean ground space, I mean we can see so much sky now! 

I forgot how much I love watching clouds.

And stars! 

My goodness!

I have sat outside most nights looking up, counting satellites.

I saw 3 satellites pass the same spot within seconds of each other, all in different directions. 

Ive never seen anything like it!

And I saw the most amazing shooting star a few nights back, so big, bright orange, long tail and it seemed to last for ages!

I have a few arty crafty projects on the go that I should be getting on with.

I'll share them when they are done.

Stay safe and keep happy 🖤🖤🖤

P.s. Today I am grateful for...

1. Having this extra time at home with my boys. They won't be this young forever.

2. Being re-inspired to find my true self again, the little piece of hippy~gypsy in my soul.

3. Patience. Not usually something I work well with, but hindsight has shown me the benefits of patience, and that waiting to make a decision can be for the best.